first target

I have no idea what to post for today. lol
hmm..
I think I'll post about my first target, Grace Chee? ^^

last Sunday Puay Huang told me that Grace had a bf.
I was like 'oh really? O.o'
well, before that Weng Hoe already told me the same thing.
he even showed me the pic of both of them from her Facebook profile.
at that time I believed they were just friends.
because just a picture doesn't prove anything bout their relationship.
so.. since I hadn't add her in my Facebook yet, (actually I dared not add >.<)
I went to check out her bf's profile instead. xD (again.. please don't call me a stalker LOL)
and it turned out that he was her bf indeed. O.O

wow.
I wasn't sad but surprised.
I was surprised that her bf is not a Chinese?
he is a Malay or Indonesian or whatsoever blend of races.
okay.. something new for her.
maybe she's bored of peach-coloured dicks and craved for deeper colour dicks instead. lol
damn it I'm jealous of him.
he's so lucky to get a cute and busty gf!
I hope one day I will get a sexy gf like Grace. xD

hmm.. from her photos,
she still looks the same. (like duh!)
I wonder why I liked her.
I had a crush on her since form 1. OMG
Zi Qian last time asked me what do I like about her.
man I had problems answering her.
maybe her cute look attracted me.
but definitely her big busts attracted me hell lot. xD
so.. after all it's not an affection but a lust. =(
if it's really affection.. heck I would have fallen in love with Shin Hui too. LOL
maybe I'll like her for real if we are close friends.
like.. as close as me and Joon Leng? ^^

let me recall how I had feelings for her during form 1.
hmm..
I think it began like this..
one day Josiah and Kai Ming told me that Grace adored me.
my reaction was 'har!? u sure ah?'
so, Kai Ming started telling me where he got the info from.
and I actually believed him! >.<
then, I began putting my attention on her.
I sort of wanted to find out if she really adores me. (silly me xD)
before that I wasn't even aware of her existence in my class. LOL
and later.. somehow I noticed she was cute and started to like her. =.=
I was attracted to her look until early form 3.
because beginning form 3, I began to notice her busts. xD
so.. the 'affection' continued until the end of form 5. haha

however, I feel a little guilty.
I scared her really much during form 5.
well, at that time, I was a total noob in approaching girls.
I just approached her all of a sudden and began talking to her without considering the fact that we were not close at all. LOL
so.. until the time where she was really frustrated and started avoiding me, I was mad and put the blames on her.
I told myself to hate her for her attitude.
hmm..
now to think back rationally bout how I approached her back then.
it was really scary actually. haha
I don't think it was her fault because if I were in her shoes, I would have the same attitude too. LOL
aye..
I feel like apologizing to her for my immaturity. >.<