changed

yesterday as I was stalking one of my friend's profile,
in his friend list,
I saw her profile.
she got a new profile picture.
I don't know whether it is me being *insert word here* or something else.
I think she looks really good in that pic.
*sighs*
I must constantly remind myself that this story is already over.
I have to say she has changed a little.
this year she concerns her appearance a lot.
she even talked to me about she wanting to be pretty instead of cute. =.=
looking at her hairstyle and her dressing now.
what I said must be true right?
it's a good change.
I'm happy for her.

at the same time, I envy her.
she got the look.
she got the brain.
she got the friendship.
she got the life.
her life is almost perfect isn't it?
and what about my life?
It is totally the opposite. =(
I always wonder why are there people like her keep living a happy life.
while people like me takes forever to live a life like this.
where is the justice? =(
it's not that I want her to suffer.
but I do hope to have a life like her one day.
ahh.. whenever I see her happily mixing with her friends,
scoring excellent results,
having outings everywhere with friends,
*sighs*
sometimes, it's not only the jealousy feeling to see her mixing with guys.
oh well, I'm sure you all understand how I feel.

alright let's not talk about it anymore.
it's very emotional I know.
at least now I have a reason to dislike her.
otherwise I will not get over her.

I'm sorry for editing this post.
I don't want it to be a very emotional post.
Hence, I think it's better to take back my statements earlier. =)


bye bye bye....