survival game

right now as I'm typing.. ET's online.
I wonder if I should approach her again.
I have already bothered her enough since Thursday night.
I wished her good luck on Thursday night.
I asked her how was her exam on Friday.
Then, I wished her good luck again on Sunday night.
Yesterday. I asked her again how was her exam.
but.. yesterday I think her mood was bad as she said she flunked her exam.
she didn't really respond me. (like.. didn't reply me)
oh well.. I was fine with it.
I told myself.. I must not expect anything when I talk to her.
I felt so much better after having such thought.
I have to thank Shun Hong for it.
because last Thursday, I was afraid to wish her good luck.
I was afraid of her cold reply.. or the awkwardness between us.
I asked Shun Hong for advice.
his reply was
Shun Hong: well, how about.. u wish her good luck and not expect anything in return?

WOW
that reply made me realize that most of the time.. whenever I talk to her or gave her something, I always expected something in return.
in the end I'll always ended up disappointed.
so from now onwards.. I will not expect anything on whatever things I do to her. whether talk to her, mess with her, joke with her, getting her gifts and so on.
of course it has to be positive attitude towards her la.
like that.. I don't have to fear the outcome ady.
if the outcome is good, it's good then. I'll be happy.
if the outcome is bad, well.. just let it be? maybe I can learn where I have gone wrong too. ^^
that was why I wasn't afraid to talk to her for that 4 days.

I don't know whether my thought is right or not. =P
haih.. after 2 paragraphs of awakening, WHY THE HECK AM I NOT APPROACHING HER NOW!? SHE'S STILL ONLINE!!
LOL
I don't know.. I'm afraid to disturb her.
I have already bothered her enough.
If I continue bothering her.. what if she thinks I'm annoying? what if she thinks I'm scary?
I think for the moment I better not approach her.
It's part of the players' tactics anyway. O.o (the cold move XD)

back on topic.. well Wednesday it'll be exactly a week since my holidays started.
honestly.. I'm starting to dislike it.
because I feel kinda bored staying at home most of the time.
and.. it's a nightmare to stay at home with my sister. GYAAA
my sister is still jobless, that's why I have to see her fuck face every morning.. opps I mean every afternoon XD.
I don't know why must she keep track of all the things I do.
she just asked me why am I still awake. WTF?
her reason? "I'm curious la"
retarded bitch, u have nothing better to do is it??
instead of keeping track of what I do, go get a job la asshole.
man.. talking about it.
I can say.. I'm currently playing the survival game.
YES survival game!
the rule of the game: TOLERATE!
just tolerate my bloody sister all the way. JEEEZZZZZ
rewards of the game are:
1) transport to anywhere in PJ
2) my lunch and sometimes dinner
punishments for breaking the rule of the game are:
1) have to see sister's fuck face
2) don't need to talk to sister for FEW MONTHS
haih.. this game.. haih.. don't know will last how long..
maybe until my sister gets a job.. like.. end of this year? OMG!

hehe.. to save my own arse out of this game, I think I'll be working part time at a company. my dad got me that job.
what my job do is.. data entry? like key the datas in wan..
aiyo.. looks hard man.. I'm scared I cannot do it.
what if I suck till.. I kena fired??? NNOOOO!!
actually.. my decision to work part time obviously is not to avoid the survival game la.
I just want working experience. hehe
I think I'm working in an office, so maybe.. I can learn a lot of things.
kinda looking forward to it. ^^ as well as my pocket money XD.

oh yea.. WTF I approached her.
soso conversation. her mood is still not good as I can tell.
hmm.. I made the wrong move this time? T.T